I Might be Miley
by Chules
Summary: Miley Stewart is totally over the whole double life thing, but there's one question that's standing right in her way: Is Miley really Hannah, or is Hannah really Miley? Rated T for language and content.
1. Chapter 1

I Might Be Miley

**I Might Be Miley**

_Dear Diary,_

_Isn't it funny how things pile one on top of the other until you have a hazardous tower of problems and commitments? Eventually, even the smallest task can send the entire tower into smithereens, and random people who don't know that you have so many problems think you're just spazzing out irrationally. To avoid confusion, you have to tell the entire story, so the person who accused you of spazzing out in the first place doesn't think you're a freaky bitch who needs to go to anger management classes. Once everything was out you felt much better, didn't you? _

_Well, I decided to eliminate the need to spill my anger management-needing guts out to random people I meet who happen to be the lucky (not) people I spaz out all over. To do this, I write everything down in Lenny, my favorite bubble gum pink diary/journal thinggie. There has never been a problem with this method of storing my spaz-feelings until now._

_Lenny is in jeopardy of being abducted but my college age brother, Jackson. He seems to think that his livelihood depends on whether or not I have embarrassing stories about him that I'll break out the next time he gets a serious girlfriend, just to embarrass him. And, of course, he's hoping that some embarrassing stories about me might be in there as well. _

_To save my dear Lenny from Jackson, I had to –sniff- burn him. But, I had almost all of him committed to memory. But there is one particular event that I want to have in crystal clarity for the rest of my life. I ripped the pages from Lenny out and have glued them to the pages of my new notebook._

_How, you may feel inclined to ask, does burning Lenny and them going directly into another notebook save your embarrassing stories? I answer with another question. If you were going to try to steal you little sister's diary, would you expect the diary to be kept in the pink fuzzy notebook with "PRIVATE!" stickers all over it, or the plain purple notebook with "ALGEBRA II/TRIG" written on the cover with a sharpie? That is the difference between Lenny and my new journal/diary. I will name you Vince. From this point forward, all my new entries are going to be headed: "Dear Diary Vince," The same way I headed Lenny's pink pages. _

_I don't want to use up all of my new Target brand notebook just writing the introduction, and besides, I still want to have pages for my story. So, Vince, please do not think badly of me after hearing about my darkest time. Just accept it as my history, and remember that you are sworn to secrecy. _

_Now, I have to go find a new hiding place for my diary before Jackson comes in and finds me here._

_Your new friend,_

_Miley Stewart._


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

It's funny how three little words can change the entire way you look at things, like my friend, Oliver Oken. It seems like just this morning, I didn't even think about him existing at all, and now I am subconsciously aware that he is out there somewhere, probably thinking about me. How amazing is that, that he cares about me enough to do that??

But, you still have no idea what I'm talking about. I guess people yelling at me to shut up about my damn news finally got through to me and I'm trying to stop talking about it all the time, but yes, you need to know. You are my diary, after all.

OLIVER OKEN ASKED ME OUT!!

Oh yeah, totally. And guess what? He loves both halves of me. Even though he doesn't know that my other half is actually me. You know what I'm talking about, right? The Hannah side of my personality is what I'm talking about for you slow, slow diary.

And, of course, Oliver is trying to say that he's over his crush on Hannah Montana, which I deeply, deeply am thankful for (because it's kind of creepy for a guy to have a crush on you and not even know it's you. It sends shivers down your spine just to think of it.) But I know how he really feels (creepy bad shivers, not excited happy shivers.) and deep down, he still loves Hannah Montana because subconsciously, he knows that it's me.

But there is one problem to the whole fairy tale: Oliver and Lilly still don't know that I'm Hannah Montana. I've been thinking of a way to break it to them, but I'm really worried about making sure that they can keep a secret and all that crap about trustworthiness.

Because, seriously, how sucky would it be if Lilly accidentally told Amber and Ashley that I'm Hannah Montana when they piss her off? Or if Oliver was trying to brag about me as his girlfriend, and he lets it slip that I'm a famous pop star? I know Lilly had anger issues and Oliver is a horrible secret-keeper.

But, after that long digression about stupid Hannah secrets, I want to get back to the main reason I'm writing. Those three words that changed my life were I love you. Of course, I've heard these words way too many times, but they mean more coming from your male best friend than your dad, or Mamaw, or even Aunt Dolly.

I was sitting all alone in the cafeteria because Lilly was at cheerleading practice. And Oliver and I weren't sitting together because boys and girls just don't sit together in the Sea View High cafeteria. It doesn't happen, so Oliver sits with the football guys and Lilly and I, being the social outcasts that we are, sit at the tiny cracked table in the corner of the cafeteria that all the dead bugs get swept into. I know, appetizing, isn't it?

Then Oliver came over to the table where I was eating peanut butter al alone and sat in Lilly's seat. And he started talking to me.

"Hey, Miley. What's up?" Oliver said all casual, as though he wasn't going to make a speech about his eternal love for me. (Even though he didn't do that anyway, he just said I love you.)

"Nothing much. Lilly's at cheerleading, and I'm just here, all alone. Just me and the bugs." I answered with my cunning wit and charm (not)

"Oh, lovely. But you know what really is lovely?" He asked, looking into my eyes.

"What?" I asked smiling, thinking that he was going to say that new painting in the hallway, or be sarcastic and say, the football jerk's pit stink.

"Your eyes."

"What??"

"You don't think your eyes are beautiful?"

"No, well, I guess…why?"

"I love your eyes. But I love you more."

This one was really unexpected. Seriously, how many times a day, does you best friend say he loves you and your eyes?

"Well, I like you too."

"Not love?"

"I don't know. It might be love."

"Is it love?"

"Yes, Oliver. I love you too."

And Oliver kissed me, right there over the cracked table with the dead bugs in the corner of the cafeteria. And I loved every second of it.

I LOVE OLIVER OKEN!! I LOVE OLIVER OKEN!! I LOVE OLIVER OKEN!!

Your loving friend,

Miley Stewart

(P.S.: I LOVE OLIVER OKEN!!)


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

This is Miley again, and I just wanted to say: dammit, I can't believe my rotten luck. I mean, seriously, could the Hannah secret be any more annoying? Yes, my next concert is on the same night as the night that Oliver and I were going to go out. How much does that suck? Let me count the ways. It sucks as much as a vacuum cleaner on a thousand year old carpet. It sucks as much as the spit sucker in the dentist's office that keeps your mouth dry when you get the fluoride treatment. It sucks as much as not being able to go on a date with the boy of your dreams because you have to go to a stupid Hannah concert.

I just got off the phone with Oliver. Dad said I had to call him soon so that he wouldn't get too excited about the date that was never going to happen.

So, Oliver was pretty upset. He sounded almost like he was about to cry. I mean, seriously, I knew I was hot, but I didn't know I was hot enough to make a guy cry when I cancel a date with him. I felt really bad because I couldn't even tell him the real reason that I couldn't go with him. Daddy said that telling him I had to go to a doctor's appointment was a good cover-up story, but it sounded really lame, even to me when I told Oliver that was the reason.

So, anyway, this is what happened after lunch:

Oliver and I left the cafeteria hand-in-hand and went to meet Lilly in the gym. Lilly waved to us, but as soon as her eyes fell on our entwined hands, she went sour. She was probably thinking that she would become the third wheel if we started dating. I mean, I know I would feel awkward if Lilly and Oliver started dating and made out right in front of me. Awkward.

So then we came up to her and she looked at us and kind of fake smiled.

"So, what's new with you?" Lilly asked, even though she obviously knew.

"We're kind of going out now. Like, together." Oliver said. (He has such a way with words!)

"Yeah," I added (I'm even more amazing!)

"So, for how long?" Lilly asked, eyeing our hands, and subsequently our lips.

"About since lunch started." I answered.

"Where were you guys sucking face? Locker room? Football field? Under the stands? Behind the pine trees? Where?" Lilly pressed for details.

"Um, at the bug table." I answered. Oliver looked confused.

"That table I was sitting at? It's where Lilly and I always sit. We call it the bug table because the janitor sweeps the dead bug over there." I explained.

"He thinks nobody's a looser enough to sit over there." Lilly added. I gave her the evil eyeball for making me sound like a dork in front of my new boyfriend.

"Well, it isn't like Oliver doesn't know that we're geeks! He's one too! The only reason the football jocks let him sit over there is because his mom always sends him cookies." Lilly said.

"Lilly!"

"Hey, Miles chill. I know, okay? And I'm cool with it." And that is why I seriously love Oliver. He's so calm and together. Lilly can't make him mad.

So then, throughout classes, Oliver and I kissed, and held hands. Lilly looked kind of annoyed, but we'll talk it out later and I'm sure she'll be cool.

Oops, Daddy said that I have to get ready for my concert now. Wish me luck so I don't burp into the microphone again during _Life's what you Make it. _

You're friend,

Miley Stewart


	4. Chapter 4

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

I am going to be in such big trouble if anyone ever finds out what happened at the Hannah concert. But since you know I can't keep a secret, I'll tell you now, so I won't be tempted to tell Lilly or somebody else who will subsequently tell Oliver and make me look like a slut. Seriously, I'm not one! Even though it might sound like I am after you hear the story, I'm seriously not. SERIOUSLY!

So dad thought it would be cool for me to have some celebrity guest singers with me tonight. So I sang "We Got The Part With Us" with the Jonas Brothers, and I sang "Old Blue Jeans" With Ashley Tisdale, and then I sang "One in a Million" With Jake Ryan. Oh, and "Bigger Than Us" With Vanessa Hudgens, but she was really bad so I'm counting her out.

After the concert there was this party on Jake Ryan's yacht. All the performers were invited. I was dancing around and having a good time. The problems was, so was my dad. Even though Daddy's really big on me never becoming an underage drunk, he drinks A LOT. He was hamming it up with Vanessa. I seriously swear he tried to _feel her up_. Ew, dad, sexual predator much? (The weird thing is, I think Vanessa liked it? Eeeew, creepy thoughts, creepy thoughts!)

I was standing by the punch bowel, making sure no hot-headed celebrity studs tried to spike it and ruin my one safe source of liquid. And I was also keeping an eye on my daddy, trying not to be completely humiliated by him. (Which was pretty hard, by the way, considering the predicament described above.) And then Jake Ryan came up to me and started trying to make small talk. I'd write down exactly what he said, but I wasn't really paying attention (which is what got me into trouble) so I can't really remember that well. I thought it was something about the weather, so I was just nodding my head and saying "Yeah, me too." Every time he paused. Then there was a particularly long pause.

"Well?" He said. He looked very hopeful and quite expectant of a quick answer. From the face he was making, I guessed that a yes would be what makes him happiest, so I answered.

"Yes." His eyes lit up and he practically started happy dancing right there.

"Thanks, Hannah. I'm so glad you said yes." He said. I had too look over his shoulder on my tiptoes to see my dad. Things were getting really embarrassing on the dance floor so I began to edge my way to daddy to break the couple apart.

"I'm glad I said yes too." I started to turn away. Jake grabbed my wrist and said something that sounded really weird.

"I'll pick you up at seven on Saturday."

What I really wanted to ask was 'what for?' but that would make it sound like I wasn't listening.

"One question, what should I wear?" I asked. If I didn't know where I was going at seven on Saturday, it might be hard to get dressed.

"I'm sure you'll think of something spectacular to wear to the restaurant. You do like Le Fancy? Right?" Oh, so we're going to Le Fancy, the five star French restaurant that is always so busy and so expensive, that celebrities are the only people who can actually get seated, and then pay for the sky-high prices. I'd never been there, but just going with whatever he said seemed easier than trying to convince him that McDonald's was better.

"Oh, I love Le Fancy." I lied. "I'll wear something 'spectacular'." Then I flashed him an award winning Hannah smile and tore my dad away from Vanessa.

It wasn't until I was safely back at home, wig-less and creepy drunken parent action-less, that I fully realized that I had just set up a date with some guy. This guy was not my boyfriend. My boyfriend didn't know. I was seriously getting on the racier side of celebrity life.

Your adulteress friend,

Miley Stewart

(P.S. Even though this entire thing was about Hannah.)


	5. Chapter 5

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

Okay, so I slept on it, and I decided that the nice thing to do would be to call Jake and tell him that I wasn't paying attention to him, and I have a boyfriend. Oh, what if he asks me who the boyfriend is? I can't tell him that it's Oliver!

I figured it out, If he asks, I'll tell him that it is a guy from my home town named Evan. I originally had Bob, but that seemed too much like I was making it up. I'm going to call him now.

I just got off of the phone with Jake. Here's how the conversation went:

Me: Hey, It's Hannah. What's up, Jake?

Jake: Not a whole lot. Hey, how'd you get my phone number?

Me: Um, celebrity grapevine. Selena Gomez has everyone.

Jake: Oh. Did you want to talk about something?

Me: Yeah, about our date…

Jake: I wanted to talk to you about that too. Listen, I'm really glad you want to go to Le Fancy with me. I'm not supposed to tell anyone, because my agent say's it will be reputation damaging, but I've never really gone on a real date before. All the girls I ask out, either just act star struck, or totally bored with me. You seemed like you were truly interested in hanging out with me, as Jake; not hanging out with Jake Ryan: Zombie Slayer. You're going out with me because you like me, not because your agent wants you to for image reasons, or because you kiss my poster every night before bed like an obsessed fan. You're real. I want this date to be real. Thank you so much.

Me: Wow.

Jake: Now, what were you going to say?

Me: Oh, I just wanted to ask if this was going to be floor length dress fancy or knee length dress fancy.

Jake: Either one will work. I'm sure you'll be hot.

Me: Hot, uh, thanks. Bye, Jake. See you on Saturday.

And then I hung up. But what was I supposed to do? He had fallen under the typical celebrity-image-dating-freeze. Everybody wants his image, but nobody wants him. I guess one date with him wont hurt. Besides, Oliver won't even know that it's me if the date makes the news, or even the back of the arts and life section. Oliver doesn't read that section anyway. He says that Dear Abby is femmie only.

You're relieved friend,

Miley Stewart.

(P.S. Besides, he called me hot. You _have _to do something nice for a guy if he calls you hot.)


	6. Chapter 6

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

To tell you the truth, I haven't been completely faithful about making sure that all of my major milestones have been put into this diary, Lenny. I forgot to write about how, on Wednesday, Oliver asked me to come to see a movie with him on Saturday at seven o'clock, and I had to tell him that my dad got us tickets to go to a baseball game. Or about how Oliver asked me to come over to his house after school on Thursday to study for our Algebra II test on Friday. I had to tell him that I was grounded for drawing emo smiley faces on my arms with a sharpie again, but really I was having a costume fitting for a Hannah benefit dinner next Monday. (Hannah's not the one benefiting, underage mothers are, but Hannah, being a teenage girl, is supposed to identify with them, give them hope and congratulate them for not choosing an abortion.)

So, Oliver and I haven't gone anywhere other than school and the places that we always used to go with Lilly, when we were just friends. But that hardly counts as a date because dates are special, and not with Lilly. Not that I don't love Lilly (like a sister, that is.) but you can hardly take your best friends with you on a date. Unless you're double dating, but Lilly doesn't have a boyfriend, so I have to go alone.

Actually, I'm writing this at 6 o'clock in the morning. I have to go to school in a half an hour, so I'll write more the second I get back from school. Since I've hardly used a page, I'll write more on the bottom of this page.

Your late friend,

Miley Stewart

Dear Diary Lenny,

I told you I'd be back really soon. Well, actually it was a long time, but whatever, I'm no longer making sense, even to you, Lenny.

This was really weird. Oliver was avoiding me. He said hi to me in the halls, and bye as we raced out to our busses, but we didn't pass notes in Algebra II, or English Lit, like we always do. He just ignored the notes until there was a small pile of torn notebook paper by his shoes.

Oliver didn't sit at the bug table with me either. (He usually does, in flagrant disregard of the natural order of the universe.) I think it's romantic that he risks his reputation for me, but today he wasn't even in the cafeteria. Lilly was gone too, but Fridays the cheerleaders hide behind the bleachers and eat wilted Mc Salads that Jessie, the cheerleading captain, sneaks off campus to buy. I wonder where Oliver was. I know he's a boy, but even boys know that you can't mysteriously disappear from the lunchroom without your girlfriend, if applicable! For all I know he could have been making out with the hot cheerleaders behind the bleachers! Oh my god. My boyfriend was probably making out with Lilly and I was all alone at the bug table, and I didn't even know! Ohmigod, ohmigod, ohmigod.

Oliver is totally unfaithful! Well, so am I, but he doesn't know it and I'm Hannah then, so it hardly counts. Oliver is cheating on me! What am I going to do??

Your betrayed friend,

Miley Stewart

(P.S. I can't believe he would do that! I have to call him now!)


	7. Chapter 7

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

I'm so confused. I called Oliver last night, and he said that he was just working in the library for some last minute studying for that Algebra II test. I have no reason not to believe him, because I got information from Kelly, a freshman on the cheerleading squad, that Lilly was with the group, the whole lunch period, behind the bleachers. I guess If I'm really that paranoid, I can check the library log on Monday to see who was in there at lunch period on Friday.

So that problem is at a standstill for the moment. I believe that Oliver would never lie to me, his girlfriend about being in the library without me.

Oh, I just realized what you must have been thinking! No, I did not just call Oliver and say, "Hey, it's your girlfriend, were you sucking the lips off of my best friend at lunch today?" I have more class than _that._ Geez, give me some credit! This is how the phone call really went:

Me: Hey, Oliver, it's me.

Oliver: Huh? Oh, um, h-hey, Miley.

Me: How was your day?

Oliver: What? Uh… cool. Cool.

Me: Do you think you passed your algebra II test?

Oliver: Not so sure, I mean, I did get an extra study session in the library at lunch time but… hey, you're not mad at me because I flaked at lunch to go study, right? It's just that you're kind of distracting when I'm trying to get my work done. Understand? It's okay if you don't, but…

Me: Me? Mad? I'm just…I'm just glad you got your extra studying in. See you at school tomorrow.

Oliver: You sure there's no way we could go out this weekend?

Me: I'm so sorry, but I'm going to Tennessee to visit my Mamaw Stewart.

Oliver: I though your dad got you tickets to something.

Me: what? Oh, he did. I Guess I forgot to tell you that the tickets were for a game in Tennessee. Mamaw keeps complaining that we don't spend enough time with her.

Oliver: Yeah, okay. I'll see you on Monday.

Me: Bye.

Or something like that. Lilly and Oliver were sitting kind of close on the front lawn this morning, but they were whispering. I just home they weren't whispering about me or loving each other. Oops, I'm going to be late. I have an hour until I have to meet Jake at the restaurant. You know, Le Fancy? Toodles!

Your still suspicious friend,

Miley Stewart

(P.S. I think I forgot to mention, I had to call Jake again to tell him that I was going to meet him at Le Fancy. Jake can't come to pick up Hannah at Miley's house, now can he?)


	8. Chapter 8

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

Wow, that date was somethin' else. Jake was very honest and open with me about all of his feelings. Mostly, he talked and I nodded. Surprisingly, I remember everything he said, even though I spent the whole time staring into his gorgeous blue eyes.

The date started off with a bang. Jake and I were full on kissing (on the lips!!) before we were even seated. There was nothing more involving our mouths (except eating and talking, of course) while we ate. I think that's because we were seated at a big table, and we couldn't reach each other without lying on our dinners.

Jake talked A LOT, but here's a bit of one of our conversations:

Jake: Wow, this restaurant is nice. It's almost as nice as the restaurant my dad took me and my brother to after my mom's funeral."

Me: You never told me that your mom died. Oh, I'm so sorry. You also never mentioned that you have a brother.

Jake: That's because I don't. Well, not anymore, that is. His name was T.J. Dad beat him to death.

Me: Oh, my! Do you live with your dad?

Jake: No, I'm an emancipated minor. Dad sends me letters once a month, if you want to call them that.

Me: Why wouldn't I call them letters?

Jake: The latest one read like this: 'Jake, I hate you, spawn of Satan. You're just like your mother in everyway except that she's dead, and you're, unfortunately, still alive. Someday, I'll change that. I never wanted you.' And then… then, I can't say it. You're a-a lady, and I won't use such language around a lady.

Me: Well, I wouldn't exactly call myself a lady. I use, uh, coarse language, all the time. I know what you mean.

Jake: Even if you're used to it, I don't think you'd want to hear it the way my dad used it. It was ugly, and, well, soul obliterating.

And that was all before the appetizers even arrived! Throughout the rest of the meal, I also learned that his mom died of skin cancer that came from all of her trips to the tanning both in her prostitute days. His dad was an addict to just about everything you can be. Before he was killed, T.J. was a juvenile delinquent. He murdered cats and dogs that he found wandering the streets in broad daylight. And his grandparents were either shot by his dad, or acted as though he didn't exist because they were ashamed of his dad.

I could tell that he was holding back, even. So it wasn't the happiest of conversations. I felt so bad for him. When he asked me about my family, I told him about evil cousin Lou Ann, because I didn't have the heart to tell him about the rest of my picturesque family.

That night I just couldn't say no to him. When he asked me to pick up the bill, I agreed happily, when he kissed me harder and stronger in the limo to his house, I accepted it. Oliver was miles from my mind.

OLIVER!

Oh, damn. I completely forgot that I had a boyfriend who wasn't Jake. Damn.

Whomever my boyfriend is, I feel that it's my duty to continue with what happened in the limo. It wasn't long before Jake and I were frenching. But his tongue wasn't the only thing that was exploring. He seemed to be enjoying the glitter and sequins on the chest of my strapless gown. I did draw the line at him taking me into his house. I was afraid of what I'd find. He also told me that his dad had a key to his house, and I was afraid of finding him.

Whops, dad just came in and told me to turn the lights out. Guess I'd better do that.

Your still-tingling friend,

Miley Stewart

(P.S. I am sooooo screwed with the whole Oliver thing. If he finds out, but I still feel bad.)


	9. Chapter 9

Dear Diary Lenny,

Dear Diary Lenny,

This entire weekend, I couldn't stop thinking about Jake and how he felt. ALL of him. His lips, his hands, his chest, just to name a few. Thinking about Jake gives me the same ecstatic euphoria that performing as Hannah does. Filling the hole just deepens it and my need for more. Needless to say, when Jake asked me out again I said yes.

He called me on Sunday morning. I had just gotten out of the shower, and was still wearing my favorite pink bathrobe with my hair all wound up in a towel when I answered the phone. When Jake said hello, my heart did back flips. I felt revealed, even though I was only talking to him on the phone, I felt as if he knew I wasn't Hannah, I was a damp Miley wearing a robe.

This time, Jake didn't tell me where we were going. He just said to wear something like I wore to Le Fancy. I told him he still couldn't pick me up from my house, so he'll come and get me from the concert hall. I have a sound check there beforehand anyway.

I'm totally psyched about the date, but I still feel guilty about Oliver. What if he finds out Hannah and Jake went on a date last weekend? He won't know it's me, but when I turn a deep crimson, that will be hard to explain. I really want him to be my one and only love, but that would mean getting rid of Jake. Both boys have an appealing sensation connected with their presents. I can't imagine breaking up with either one of them. For now, I guess I've got the best of both worlds.

Back to my high school problems, Lilly has totally been checking Oliver out. The way she regards him with unusually heavily made-up eyes is disgusting. It's painfully obvious to everyone at school that Lilly feels the steam with Oliver. But, every time Lilly's going crazy over _my _man, I smile, remembering that Oliver is _mine. _Oliver is totally and completely and utterly and all other adverbs that mean the same thing as the previous three, mine. At least one of us in the relationship is faithful.

But, maybe not. Oliver has been acting almost nervous whenever I'm around him, like he just figured out I'm a lesbian, or cannibal, or some other psycho person. I'll have to talk to him about it soon, because this web is getting a little too tangled.

Your painfully twisted friend,

Miley Stewart


End file.
